Infidelity. Lust. Just another day at the office

Dear John:

I’m in love with a married man at work. I’m single and very attractive. I have felt this way about him for a long time and even though I feel very strongly, I’ve never acted on anything because of his marriage.

Recently though, something happened. Our eyes locked and for a moment I thought we were going to kiss. We didn’t, I pulled away.

I’m going crazy thinking he feels the same way I do. How should I move forward with this “relationship?”

–Confused–

Confused:

When you get involved with someone you work with, your life can get complicated. When you get involved with a married man, your life can get VERY complicated. But when you do both, your whole world can be turned upside down. 

I think you have already gone crazy. Why would you even consider this?

The odds of you two having a successful relationship are about as good as Kim K and Kris Humphries celebrating a 50^th wedding anniversary. (this was written before that actually DID breakup!)

You are not alone

 According to infidelityfacts.com (yup, there’s actually a site about this), 36% of all affairs occur with a coworker. 

But please consider these questions:

What are the odds he feels the same way you do (you don’t know what he’s thinking)?

Would his intentions be noble (if he is someone who cheats)?

What are the odds he’d cheat on you too (very good)?

And why are you so attracted to someone who isn’t good for you or should be off limits (this is the real question)?

Have you ever sat down and really thought about what you want in a relationship, not what type of guy gives you the vapors? If not, I suggest you do so.

I’ll bet Kim K’s engagement ring that what you want doesn’t include a whole lot of drama with a married man.

Since you say you love him, so to answer your question about moving forward, back off and leave him alone. If he makes a first move, run the other way. Don’t even bring up.

Please focus on what’s best for both of you, especially yourself. Put yourself in a situation that gives you a good chance of finding the right partner.

If you are “single and very attractive,” you should have no problem meeting guys. Just take your time and choose one that’s good for you.

I understand that to some, the grass is always greener on the other side but in this case, it’s nothing but weeds.

Tagged as: affair, coworker, married man